The Ancient Cat Toy Burial Ground

      I was putzing around in the kitchen earlier today when my foot struck one of the little flat bowls we use to feed the BHOC, and ZIPPO it slid under the oven like an air hockey puck. Sure, I was now up 1-0, but I knew for a fact that Donna had done exactly the same thing less than a week ago. And LEFT IT THERE. But I digress.
      Since I knew the cats had occasionally lost toys under there, and the stove hadn't been pulled out for cleaning in months, I girded up my loins and dragged it from its cubby. Let's just take a little...WHOA NELLIE BOZO! I'm thinking of calling the National Geographic, because I have discovered the fabled Ancient Cat Toy Burial Ground.
      That's Porter investigating the grisly remains, perhaps reconnecting with long-lost friends he thought were gone forever. You might have thought the other picture was of some child's box of cherished collectibles, a hoard of doodads whose pedigree and significance are known only to the little kid who lovingly squirreled them away and invested them with the mysterious power of keepsakes. But no, that's just all the crap I hauled out from under my stove, every single item an accidental goal in our cats' neverending game of kitchen air hockey. The cats have already dug around in the box and pulled out a couple of blasts from the past to play with, but here's a partial inventory of the rest:

• 10 actual cat toys--some whiffle golf balls, plastic jacks, tiny stuffed mice, and a couple of spiky plastic rolly thingies that look like undersea mines.
• Numerous homemade cat toys, like an empty thread spool, some wadded up bits of paper, bottlecaps (twist and flip), and a plastic milk cap ring.
• And many completely cat-improvised toys, including a grievously maimed origami kangaroo, two tiny Christmas ornaments, a walnut and an acorn, a pen, a clothespin, and an empty tube of Airborne® cold medicine.

      Now I've got to find some place to keep all this junk, so it once again can be doled out piece by piece to thrill and exercise the kitties. At least for the ten minutes it takes them to maneuver back into the kitchen and light the red light. GOOAAALLLLLLLLLL!